Dyslexia? I wish.

For our visit to Chicago I packed the tops I had embroidered for the girls so as to show them to their grandma. Ava, of course, happily put hers on and showed grandma how she had helped pick the colors, etc. etc. Cathryn, on the other hand, took one look at the top and proceeded to have a nuclear-power-plant-worthy meltdown.

How could I possibly ask her to wear this horrific monstrosity? Didn't I know that she hated it? HATED! IT! and would NEVER wear it, not in a million billion infinity years! EVER!

Just in case I was not sure if she liked it or not.

Fine. Got it. You don't like the shirt. BUT, and this is a big BUT, let's take a moment to talk about civility. And how, if someone spends a great deal of effort making you something, you need to be grateful. Even if you don't like it. Even if that person gave birth to you.

NOOOOOOO!!!! I will not EVER like it! I *HATE* grateful! NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

So I told her that she did not have to wear the shirt, I wasn't going to force her, but I thought she was behaving very rudely, she had hurt my feelings and I didn't want to talk to her for a while. And I left the room and went to read a magazine full of young, single, childless women, clearly enjoying their young, single, childless lives. A few minutes later Cate comes up and yells "Fine! I'm SORRY!". To which I reply: Cathryn, you are old enough to understand that when you are rude and hurt someone's feelings, yelling "I'm sorry" at them isn't enough to make things right. I am still angry with you. Please leave me alone. She throws herself to the ground in mortal agony; my words have wounded her to the quick! When she sees that I am ignoring her she huffs off dramatically. (Probably going to tell on me to grandma)

She comes back about 5 minutes later and thrusts a piece of paper into my face. "I made this for you" she snots. It is a drawing of a woman (presumably me) and a little girl (presumably her) standing together. Both are smiling. On it she has scrawled LOVE MOMMY, although the "love" part is backwards (E-V-O-L; isn't that precious?). My heart softens. "Are you telling me you love me?"

"No. It says 'Evil Mommy'."

Of course. Thanks, kid. Have I told you lately that you are NOT my favorite?

Friendship

I went walking with Michelle this morning, around the track at Mt. SAC. As we were heading up one of the more killer hills I was suddenly attacked by a bee. I say ATTACKED. I have never witnessed this type of behavior in Apoidea, and let me tell you it was quite unsettling. The thing lodged itself in my hair, at which point it became entangled in my -ahem- glorious mane. Seriously, I could not get this thing out, and I could hear it buzzing around, close to my ear, just trying to get into my brain. I'm jumping all over the trail, hair flying wildly around me, yelling BEE! BEE! BEE! at the top of my lungs. Michelle finally stops laughing and attempts to help me by combing her fingers through my hair, saying "I don't feel anything. Are you sure it's still in there?" YES! YES! DON'T YOU HEAR IT BUZZING?!? She continues to comb through my hair, all the while yelling at me to keep still dammit! This goes on for a few minutes: her combing, me wailing, the bee getting angrier and angrier, at which point Michelle proclaims "I just want you to know I AM NOT CHANGING YOUR DIAPERS. You are on your own." At which point the bee is finally extracted from my hair and promptly goes after Michelle, because it senses her evilness.
Now who's a whiny bitch, huh? HUH?
In the end the bee flew off, probably disgusted with us both. And while Shell may not ever change my diapers she was there for me when I needed her today, and really what more can you ask of a friend?

Did You Know?

Just a few factoids to keep in mind as we grumble through our day:

*Half the world's population is living without access to clean drinking water. (BBC)

*At least 80% of the world's population lives on less than $10 a day. (globalissues.org)

*25% of the world's population doesn't have electricity. (Baker Institute)

*Three quarters of the world doesn't have internet access. (internetworldstats.com)

Living in the land of plenty (Southern California), it is often difficult to comprehend and appreciate just how stinking lucky we have it. I am trying to do this more, and find that facts like these help to keep me grounded. What thoughts help you to stay grounded? Share!

I Be Jammin'

What's that? Why yes, I have been busy. Quite busy. Doing what? Oh, you know, this and that......a bit of grading, moving my entire lab to a different building, making jam, folding laundry. You know, the usual. What? That third thing? Making jam? Yes, I make my own jam. I've been doing it since......let's see.......two Fridays ago. Practically forever.

I MAKE MY OWN JAM!!!! BY MYSELF!!!

It wasn't always like this, oh no. I, too, used to buy my jam, hanging my head in shame, desperate and confused, not knowing where to turn. But then one day, I was hanging out with my friend Elise and noticed a bunch of empty jars on her table. "What are these for?" I asked. "Oh, yeah" she answered. "Strawberries are coming in, so I'm gonna make some jam tomorrow". Just. Like. That. No big deal, no hours of preparation, no crushing anxiety. So I asked the magical Elise if she would share her secrets of jam-making with me. And she did. And it was good.




When we were finished I still had some strawberries left over. So guess what I did? I made MY OWN jam the next day. Just like that. Took Elise's recipe, semi-combined it with another recipe I found online (adding balsamic vinegar!), and made my own jam. All by myself. And it was good.






AND, so far no one has died. Bonus!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Mother's Day

The kids had a sleepover at their friend Amelie's house on Saturday night, so my *real* Mother's Day gift was the opportunity to sleep in on Sunday morning. However, they were upset that they did not get to give me breakfast in bed. Apparently on Mother's Day it is imperative that one be served some sort of food product while in bed. So, I was awakened from a lovely afternoon nap by three midgets bearing a tray of:


They shelled the peanuts themselves, the little dears.

For Mom

Yes, yes, YES. I suck. But you see, I've been busy. Doing stuff. What kind of stuff, you ask? A few little things.....some booties, a hat. But mostly these: little tops I made from a pair of pillowcases. I embroidered them for the girls for Easter presents. I told mom about them and she asked for pictures, which I immediately never sent to her. Because I am an awesome daughter like that. She also sent me a lovely Mother's Day card. I, on the other hand, thought briefly about calling her, but then ended up getting coffee instead. Again: awesome daughter.

So mom, this is for you. Happy Mother's Day.

All pictures were taken with my iPhone in crappy light. Sorry 'bout that, but if I waited for 1) the good camera (Brian's camera that only Brian is allowed to touch) and 2) good light, then this would probably not be happening at all. So.

First up, Ava's top. She is very into mermaids these days.
The front:

The blonde mermaid:
Ariel:


Ariel's pet squid:
The Back:
Octopus:
Sea horses:

Date:

Next, we have Cate's top. She has really become a reader in the last few months, so I wanted to commemorate that.
The front:
Cate in a tree:

Bunnies!


A little deer:
The Back:
Hedgie & Bunny:
The other tree (with bonus hedgehogs!):

Who's peeking?
Flutterby sleeves:
So that's it. I have some other projects I'm working on, so who knows when you will hear from me again?

Taking One For The Team

Jack: Mom? Can we have dessert?
Me: What are you thinking of?
J: We have Popsicles! And chocolate popsicles!
M: Well, actually we just have Popsicles. There was only one fudgesicle left, and I ate it last night.
J: Mooooooommmmmm! I was wanting that one!
M: I'm sorry buddy, I didn't know you wanted it.

Jack thinks about this for a moment....

J: You just wanted us to have jokes, didn't you mom?
M: I'm...ummm.....what?
J: The reglear Popsicles have jokes on the sticks. The chocolate ones don't. You ate the chocolate one so we could all have jokes today. Right mom?
M: You know, I don't think I've heard a "thank you" yet.... ;)

[Posted with iBlogger from my iPhone]